Embracing Limitations: The Truth About "Having It All"

What do you mean I cannot do million things at the same time!?

I am an overachiever, I have always been. All those quotes about ‘being instead of doing’ resonated with me a lot but when it came to reality, I struggled a lot with just ‘being’. I know, we live in a world that constantly bombards us with messages of productivity, success, and the pursuit of having it all. We worship being busy in this hustle culture. So we have the urge to do more, and more and more. It's easy to fall into the trap of believing that we can do everything, be everything, and achieve everything.

I have been told over and over again that if I work hard, put in all my time and effort, and be determined, I can reach any goal. My dad would say: '“You sleep less if you need to, and be tired for a while, but in the end, it will be worth it, always do the best and be the best at what you do.” We learn many fundamental things from our parents so this approach along with this system was a very potent combination. With all the healing work I am doing I am now realizing that this belief is not only unrealistic but also detrimental to my well-being.

As much as I'd like to think otherwise, the truth is that we are not limitless beings. We have finite time, energy, and resources, and trying to do it all inevitably leads to burnout, stress, and disappointment. This realization hit me hard recently, as I found myself caught in the relentless cycle of trying to juggle multiple responsibilities, meet endless deadlines, and maintain various aspects of my life. I had to realize that I cannot simply have a perfectly clean house everyday, cook, and eat healthy, catch up with my friends and family regularly, exercise, create art, execute all the ‘ideas’ I have, read, have time for my hobbies, do client work, organize and plan workshops, do collaborations, plan events, start a business, maintain my existing business and excel in my design career at the same time.

Despite my best efforts, I began to feel overwhelmed and exhausted, as if I was constantly falling short of some unattainable standard of success. It felt like I sucked as a joggler and all the balls end up falling. As I believed my worth depended on how many balls and for however long I was able to juggle, I was picking them up, starting over, and doing it all over again until I got burnt out and all the balls fell again, scattering everywhere.

It was during one particularly challenging moment when I was struggling to meet the deadlines of tens of projects at the same time and some had to be canceled due to lack of time. I was so disappointed, so mad at myself but also, I was secretly so relieved. Then I had a revelation: I can't do it all. And that has to be okay.

Accepting this truth was liberating. It helps me to let go of the unrealistic expectations I place on myself and embrace my limitations as a human being. I came to understand that prioritizing my well-being and honoring my need for rest and rejuvenation was not a sign of weakness, but rather an essential part of living a balanced and fulfilling life. Simply: “I will have my 8 hours of sleep.”

In a society that equates productivity with self-worth, this realization is hard. I began to question the prevailing narrative that success is measured by how much we can accomplish in a given amount of time and instead started to redefine success on my terms. I know that true success isn't about how much I can do, but rather how well I can take care of myself and cultivate meaningful connections with others.

This shift in mindset allows me to reevaluate my priorities and helps me make intentional choices about how I spend my time and energy. I started to say no to activities and commitments that drained me and yes to those that nourished me. I am learning to listen to my body and honor its need for rest, knowing that taking care of myself is the foundation upon which everything else is built.

Of course, accepting limitations isn’t easy. There are still moments when I feel the pressure to do more, and be more. (I find myself writing a crazy amount of things in my to-do list still pretty often.) But in those moments, I am learning to remind myself that I am enough just as I am. I don't need to prove my worth through constant busyness or external accomplishments. Some days, all I can offer is my presence, and that's more than enough.

So, to anyone out there who feels like they're constantly striving to "have it all," I urge you to pause and reconsider. Embrace your limitations, prioritize rest, and remember that your worth is not determined by how much you can accomplish. You are enough, just as you are. And that is truly something worth celebrating.